Annie Schwain, MA, LADC, LAMFT
612-325-2919
is your marriage on the brink of divorce?
Have you thought…
I’m just not in love anymore
My partner is never going to change
I’ve done everything I can and it feels hopeless
I want to say that I tried everything to say my marriage
If you have been questioning your marriage and whether or not to continue it, discernment counseling may be the tool you're looking for to sort things out. Discernment counseling is a short term (1-5 session) process that is not focused on solving marital or relationship problems, but on understanding how your marriage got to the point where divorce is a possibility. Based on this understanding, both partners discern whether or not they want to invest in making the changes needed to reimagine their marriage, or move through separation and divorce. Unlike traditional couples counseling that assumes that both people are willing to work on the relationship, discernment counseling allows people space to explore the ambivalence they may have about working on their marriage. While individual counseling usually takes one person's side, in discernment counseling, the therapist works to understand both partners, even if they see things very differently, and to help them come up with a plan to move forward, regardless of the path that they choose.
While discernment counseling can be a helpful tool, it is NOT useful:
If one of you is already 100% certain you want a divorce
To “let your partner down easy” because you are afraid of your partner’s reaction
If you are unwilling to look at how your own behaviors have contributed to the state of your marriage
If there is domestic violence or concerns about feeling safe for either partner
If you’re looking for more perspective, you might find it helpful to check out these chapters from William Doherty on Preventing Unnecessary Divorce and Resisting Consumer Marriage.
Discernment Counseling
$300 for a 2-hour initial session
$225 for a 90-Minute Follow Up Session (up to 4 sessions)
